I have learned a thing or two during my sixteen year stint as a parent.
Here in no particular order are a few of my more stellar parenting insights.
- Multitasking is a basic survival skill for all mothers. It become something of a game when it involves being on hold simultaneously on a cell phone and land line. It's a bit like playing the lottery trying to guess on which phone you will hear a live person first.
- The length of time it takes to assemble a toy is inversely proportional to the time a child will spend playing with it.
An hour to assemble - Five minutes playing with it
- A dog has infinitely more patience than a mother. Remington has been licking the marrow from this bone for almost a year. In that amount of time, I would have gone certifiably insane trying to accomplish such a simple task.
- Laundry will NEVER fold itself.
- When kids are deprived of electronics long enough, they get creative.
One stick, one sock, catnip and bells made for a lot of kitty fun
Example #2 of creative boredom
- Little girls grow up way too fast.
- Barbequed turtle for dinner is a guaranteed way to save on groceries. Given the minimal amount eaten last night, I should get approximately 279 meals from one cooker of meat. Yum.
- A teenager's phone is fully charged and in their hand at all times. Unless their mother is trying to call them.
- Big girls never outgrow their love of animals...especially very tiny animals.