A New Olympic Sport

Emily isn't really into the whole primitive eating thing.  We had BBQ ribs for lunch on Sunday.  She loved the meat, but refused to bite it from the bone.  She had to cut every single shred of meat off the bone and eat it with her fork.  This would be her father truing to force feed her one last bone.

Isn't he such a nice dad?

 I could live in one square foot.  I say that because no matter where I am, everyone is right there with me sooner or later.  I'm not even that nice of a person either!!  I don't get it.  I started to roll out sugar cookies Sunday evening and yep, here they all came wanting to help.  Lots of fun, just lots more mess to clean up afterward.

These guys are cutting out the sugar cookies that were going to be Valentine cookies to take to preschool.  What with all the snow, they are now Shamrock/Easter cookies.  Grace hasn't had but one day of school in two weeks.










Grant was downstairs today patting the bunny.  Apparently he took a wrong turn and "accidentally" ended up in big brother's bedroom.  He appeared upstairs again wearing John's football helmet, carrying John's old recorder and holding a squish ball of John's that he LOVES. 

Maybe he's inventing a new olympic sport for the 2014 games in Russia.  He couldn't invent anything worse than curling.  I don't get that sport.

He kept saying...."Let's  play ball, Mom."  So I had to hold the recorder and try to hit the squish ball when he threw it to me.  We ran around the couch (bases) several times before I caught him and tickled him.  Game over.

I had to make him move the ball so I could take this picture.  Parts of his "equipment" were showing.

The 'P' Word Strikes Again

Long time, no blog!!!

Would you believe we've been sick around here AGAIN????

Well, believe it.  Not fun.




Grant started in with the "regurgitation" thing (I refuse to use the 'P' word) while at the book store last Monday.  I sat on the couch with him all evening and most of the night.  He was getting sick just about every twenty minutes most of the night.  He has been dragging ever since then....alternately running a fever or getting sick at one end or the other. (I know TMI, sorry)

John then started in with it Tuesday which thankfully was a snow day.  David and I both got it Tuesday evening.  The three of us were in a contest to see who was the most miserable.  Grace started in with a milder version the next day.  Emily dodged the bullet this time.

I am hoping that is the end of the sickness for a while.

A LONG WHILE!




Anyway, I'll try to catch up with my blog/scrapbook/journal entries of what's been going on around the zoo since last week.

Not all at once mind you....that would take too long and bore anyone reading as well.





I don't know if I've even noted this yet or not, but John and Emily both made All-County Chorus this year.  They auditioned at school two weeks ago.  They are both excited.  John also auditioned for All-County Band.  He thinks he's made it.  He actually had to reaudition against one other boy because there was such tight competition for the spot.  We'll find out this week for sure. 

He made All-County Band as a fourth grader last year which is not supposed to happen.  It is supposed to be for fifth graders, but his instructor selected him.  I didn't know at the time it was limited to just two kids per school in the county.  It wasn't until parents started telling me congratulations that I sat up and took notice of what he had actually accomplished.  Add that one to my Parenting Hall of Shame list!!!

Pictures from last year's All-County performance......

He's the one in the fifth row on the left side playing trumpet.  HA HA  I know, I know. He really is there though.  Good luck finding him though.  They look like little ants from the balcony where we were sitting.











Much more later......right now it is BEAUTIFUL outside.  I am taking the kids out to play for an hour or so before dinner rolls around.




AROUND THE HOUSE LATELY................

Emily:  Where's Mom?

Grant:  She's in the washing machine. (meaning the laundry room)









(this little speech gets recited at least once a day right now)

Grant: I love you, Dad.

Dad: You are my buddy.

Grant:  You're MY best buddy.

Together: .....and WE DON'T LOVE GIRLS!!





Question: How do you know when Grace is straying from the truth?

Answer:  When she starts ANY sentence with "Well,......."
(I finally figured that one out)(I hope she continues this pattern through the teenage years)(That little piece of ammunition will make parenting her as a teenager easier)(not that I condone lying)







Question:  What does Grant HATE?

Answer:  Having his toenails trimmed.






Question:  What game are the kids still playing that drives me nutso?

Answer:  Mean Dog

Peculiar Parenting 101 - Part 2

Since my last post, I've been thinking of all the nutjob (that IS a word in the dictionary by the way) (my picture is not listed beside it) (yet) things that I have done in desperate moments.

Some have been flashes of pure brilliance......others need inducted to the hall of shame.


One is a little invention I've come up with that while rather gross is quite effective.  Did you know chewing gum will bond things better than super glue, mighty putty or hot glue?  I don't even remember what I was "fixing" the first time I used it.  I've done it many times since....always with good results.  I just figured if it's so hard to get dry gum OFF of something it's not supposed to be on then maybe it would work equally well when you want it to.  Presto, new tool in my "mom, would you fix this?" toolbox.


One of the less than proud moments involved me, Grace, a swimming pool and a dirty diaper.  The diaper was hers, not mine, in case you were confused about that.

I had taken the three kids to the pool one day when Grace was very small.  Of course tiny babies poop A LOT.  I realized AFTER I stripped my three month old baby down to her poopy diaper that I did not have any wipes in my swim bag.  No one else was swimming at the time so I had no one to borrow from.  If I bundled her back up and took her to the restrooms, I would have to drag the big kids out of the pool.  At that time, I didn't let them in the pool unless I was right there.  (I don't always trust teenage lifeguards)  I didn't want to make them get out of the pool.  I had no one to borrow from.  I did the only thing left to do.








NO, I did NOT wash her off in the pool.



Shame on you for thinking that.





I spit on her.








Hey, it worked.





I could list twenty more bad parenting moments that come to mind.  I'll spare you the list.  If you're a parent, you have your own list.  If you're not a parent, I don't want you thinking I am crazier than you already do.







Typing is therapy.  There is health in honesty.


Typing is therapy.  It relieves stress.


Typing is therapy.  Life never seems quite so bad when I go back and read it later.


Now go do something besides laugh at my insanity.

Peculiar Parenting 101 - Part 1

Sometimes kids do the darndest things. 


Sometimes parents do the strangest things.


Yesterday was both.


I was way past crazy on my MOM METER.  I just wanted to get out of the house and well, just GET OUT!!

The kids had been pretty good, but they were getting as crazy as I was.  I decided to load them up and make good on a promise to my two school kids. 


I refuse to spend money at the school book fair.  It is my personal boycott because I am so shocked at some of the book content they make available to elementary students.  I've made my kids take back more than one book that was WAY too mature (and just downright creepy) for young eyes.  Therefore, I don't let them spend money anymore at the fair.  Instead I've promised to take them to the bookstore or the used bookstore and spend an equal amount of money there.  They get books.  I get to boycott PTA bookfair.  Life is good.


Not so fast though.  This trip to the bookstore turned out to be WAY more than I bargained for. 

For starters, I drove to three stores before I found one open due to the bad weather.  No problem.  By the time I arrived at the final store, Grant had dozed off seeing as how it was late afternoon.  No problem again.

I went ahead and sent the two big kids and Grace into the store and proceeded to wake Grant up.  I bundled him in his coat instead of taking the time to put it on him and zip it up.  No problem. 

By the time we got in the store, he was wide awake and ready to go find the Thomas the train table that is always there for little ones to play with.  He was EXCITED when he figured out where we were.  He wanted down so I let him get down and walk.  No problem.

Then he turned around and said "My tummy hurts."  In that moment his face had turned a lovely shade of green.  Now I had a problem.

I knew he was going to be sick, but what is a Mom to do?  The only thing possible.  I calmly knelt down and held the hood of his coat open and caught the mess.  I then proceeded to roll it up and move on down the aisle to notify the other kids of a change in plans (namely getting the heck out of Dodge before he did a repeat performance).

Too late.  He said, "My tummy still hurts!"  We got the coat unrolled just in time to fill the ENTIRE COAT with......well, you know.  I don't mention that word on my blog anymore. Remember what happened last time? 

There I sat, three kids shopping.  One kid sick and a coat full of "stuff".  I sent John to the checkout to get a bag, stuffed the coat into the bag and proceeded to let the kids shop.  Grant seemed fine.  I wrote it off as just something disagreeing with him since he'd been fine before now.

He played with trains.  The others picked books to buy.  All was well once again.  At least until we were in the car on the way home.  Grant again shared some "stuff" with us in the car. 

That smell is so hard to get rid of.  I've always said if anyone ever puked in my car I was trading cars the next week.





I'll be at the dealership just as soon as this snow is gone.





I won't be returning to the book store any time soon.  I think they got me on surveillance camera.  They probably have my picture posted by the door as an "undesirable" customer.





Grant?


Oh, he's fine.  He puked about every twenty minutes all night long.  He finally quit about one in the morning.  Today he's going strong again.



Kids.



They do the darndest things.